Sunday, August 13, 2006

one year has passed me by...

last night as i drifted off to sleep i realized that this past Friday was one year since I had seen my ex - the man I thought I wanted to spend my life with. It was a sad and strange realization - one year since I last kissed him, held him, touched his stubbly face, was held in his arms. I realized that it is entirely possible that i will never see him again. His wonderful parents - them i am feel confident ill see. Him - not so much. I don't want my path to be different but it still feels like something is off - my best friend and partner of so many years has no role in my life at all. It is a bizarre feeling.

Switch topic here: i find it very intriguing the type of words i am learning in hebrew ulpan. I learn words every day like: attack, kill, rocket, injure, die, ground invasion. Not exactly the type of words i learned in spanish or latin back in the day in nottingham. that is current events for you.

i had a long day - ulpan, lunch with friends, study and hebrew for hours, event for work, dinner with friend...it is 12 and i have been moving since 7am...i have to stop now i think...my eyes wont stay open.

great word for the day: lizlol - to engorge, or satiate oneself

i am happy here in jerusalem, but i hope that i would be happy anywhere. Is that the true test of one's happiness?

i am happy, but one of my friends here is so clearly down for the count...and i feel like my happiness is not as complete because this person who i am beginning to care very much about is so troubled and down...i am not used to feeling this way - namely, being at a loss for what to do.

i hope this post was at least somewhat coherent.

Sweet dreams, when they come.

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