Israelis, Mexicans and teenage angst

3am. I have been going to bed late recently. It is odd to feel my body changing. I need less sleep now then I used to. I feel the same with less. I am thicker than I was a few years ago…something I welcome. I am much more appreciative of slower paced activities. I still love a wild night, but I love the quite ones too. It is a strange thing to look behind and see a different woman.

I clearly remember my flight home after my interview here last year. I sat down in JFK airport next to an older woman. She and I started talking and decided to go get some ice cream together. It turned out that she was Israeli, lived in the Eastern Townships (outside Montreal) and was an artist. She was a very cool lady. She’d gone back to school in her 40s to study studio art at Concordia. She was just back from travels abroad. After telling me about herself, she began to ask questions about me…

I told her that I had just had two interviews over the last week. Her response to my description of my job here is, in retrospect, poignantly correct. She said it sounded like glorified babysitting. Tonight I felt like a babysitter – and not even so glorified. I had to chase missing kids all over campus…but not only that…I didn’t agree with the act of chasing them. They were seniors saying goodbye to each other after 4 years together. I wanted to be supportive of my coworker, I felt torn. I am eagerly awaiting the day I get to bounce out of this place – it gets more and more painful with each day as I know I am closer to leaving my girls and the community I have created here, and I get put in to many situations that for one reason or another make me want to turn in my badge. While the positives far outweigh the negatives here, it is time to move on.

This last week has been a busy one. The fellows had several meetings with big-wigs trying to explain exactly why the year was almost entirely not what it was supposed to be. Wednesday was color war. Thursday was the faculty dinner, which the fellows were invited to even though in the last month it was decided that we in fact aren’t faculty – go figure. It was a nice evening. The seniors spent all day cooking. The food was yummy for a change and there were hilarious presentations by the students and the staff. I won an award – “Most likely to be dwarfed by a guitar.” Haha… :)

Friday we had our second all-community service for the year. I get a kick out of our method of creating a community prayer service with three sections: men and women only sections on the outside and mixed in the middle. Women and men both lead. I guess everyone is a little uncomfortable so everyone wins??? I appreciate the effort. Really. (not being sarcastic here…I swear)

Today was graduation. Three of my girls are seniors and it was an amazing thing to see them receive their diplomas. One in particular felt like a miracle. This girl has some serious issues – she pisses everyone on faculty off for the most part, has a horrible temper, has gone through lengthy periods of not doing her work and several suspensions. She is one of the angriest and manipulative people I have ever met. I am worried about her ability to handle university, to say the least. She is the perfect example of someone who would benefit from taking some time off before continuing. All of that aside though, I cried tears of joy when she took that diploma in her hand. Smart girl. Needs to channel her emotions in a way healthy for her and all those in her path. I am just so happy that she is out of my care as of tomorrow…. You see, it is good for everyone – she gets her freedom and the next stage in her life and I get mine. While it will be difficult to leave these wonderful girls, I will be happy to be decidedly more irresponsible come June 9th!

One little anecdote from my day to give a chuckle…

The Dubins and I were on our way to a graduation party packed like sardines into their van. On our way off campus a student runs up to us and flags us down. He is Mexican, very vocally so. This is the way the conversation between he and Andy:

Andy: What’s up?
Student: We need a ride to the graduation party, can you bring us?
Andy: It is a little crowded in here. I don’t think so.
Student: No, really, this is fine. [in a thick and adorable accent] We are Mexicans, we travel like this all the time over the border.

Political humor. He was only half kidding. But don’t worry, soon we’ll have all our national guard on the Mexican-US border and an A.H.A style fence (seriously, it is so elaborate here it is a little ridiculous) to boot.

[the next day]

I didn’t get around to actually posting, so here you go. Today was a lazy Memorial Day. I was supposed to take some kids out on a trip but no one showed…I spent the day cleaning, knitting, reading, sleeping, chilling with my kids. Good life has me.